Chapter 8: Dependency and Conformity
Definition of terms
How Dependent Are We?
What Makes Us So Dependent?
Compliance and obedience
Socially instilled obedience
Social-emotional needs and dependency
Love and dependency
Reactions to social influence
Gender Issues: A Woman’s Place---
Traditional roles and the Women’s Movement
Dependency in marriage
Feeling inferior and super responsible at the same time
Expectations of boys and men
What about innate dependency needs?
Women are making progress
Assertiveness and Our Excuses for Not Acting
Breaking Away From Parents
Codependency: Over-Involvement in
Someone Else’s Problems
Believing You Are in Control of Your Life:
Becoming an Internalizer
How to become an Internalizer
Learning Independent Decision-Making
How do we learn best? The Personal Growth Model
The major decisions of our lifetime
Barriers to careful decision-making
Extreme Dependency and Pathology
Dependent Personality Disorder
Dependent people as psychotherapy patients
Methods for Becoming More Self-Reliant and Independent
Level I: Learn and reward new behavior; avoid people caring for or directing you
Level II: Confront fears; vent feelings; face long-term consequences
Level III: Learn problem-solving, assertiveness, communication skills
Level IV: Set life goals, build esteem, correct irrational ideas, find support
Level V: Seek origins of your dependency, conformity, and master-slave relations
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