Psychological Self-Help

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Experience: child, allowing him/her free expression of impulses.
Overly Permissive Parent(s): Make few demands of the
(The parent may be indulgently responsive to the
child's needs or coldly indifferent to the child.)
Reaction as a
Child or as an or values, an underachiever.
Rebellious, impulsive, domineering. Self-centered but
otherwise has poor self-control, disorganized,
demanding and aggressive, without explicit ambitions
Experience: impossible standards from a child, always urging child
Perfectionistic Parent(s): Caring but demanding of
to do better, child is accepted only when outstanding.
Parents compulsive. Teach responsibility to others
(guilt). See Elkind (1988).
Reaction as a
Child or as an perfectionistic or reject parent-imposed ambitions.
Adult: Intolerant of ambiguity, suppresses emotions, but
Compulsive, tense, self-critical. Well behaved,
conscientious, high goals, achieving but belittles own
accomplishments, feels inadequate, may stay
loyal and lives by the rules.
Experience: parents (or their opposite).
Type A, Angry Parent(s): Tense, pressured, irritable
Reaction as a
Child or as an similar to fathers'.
Children similar to opposite sex parent. Some evidence
shows that adolescent boys have Type A and anger
patterns similar to their mothers'; girls' reactions are
Experience: child so that it looks like "discipline." Dominant and
Hostile, Punitive Parent(s): Parent's anger is vented on
quick to punish. Parent overreacts and provides a
model for mean behavior. (This is different from
normal discipline.) Often little or no parental guidance.
Reaction as a
Child or as an punish, feel insecure, & seek punishment. Takes jobs
Adult: that require a tough person, feels guilt about relaxing.
Anti-social, feels "no good." Belligerent, egocentric,
distrustful, revengeful, impulsive, defies laws. Feels
rejected and "it's a dog eat dog world." May self-
A hateful desire to "get back at" the world or specific
people. May fight with other children, become
delinquent or schizophrenic.
Experience: tantrums, crying, and other pleas. Submissive parents
Dominated-by-Child Parent(s): Gives in to temper
surrender all rights to the demanding child.
Demanding, impulsive, temper outbursts Child
becomes self-centered, unwilling to work hard, feels
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